Changes

Hmmm, now it's already middle of February of new year, 2011. There's a lot of changes in life but i still did't have time to update my blog... It was so long ago, my last update was back in august last year. No other excuses to be given except lazy and no interest to write at that time... And now, boredom is hitting me and I have no one to talk to.. I guess I need something to let out my mixed feeling...

Yes, there's a lot of changes in my life;

1. There's a new member in my family
2. Aizara goes to new school and has to deal with other kind of friends everyday (which I have to listen to her story everyday...)
3. Office environment is so different after I come back from my long leaves.... (everybody is busy with their own things... laughing and chatting become lesser and lesser.... turn the lively office to a very dull office... that's what i feel)
4. Cold and dead friendship with old time friend... (which really make me sad....)

First 2 changes are positive changes, which I really, really happy with those changes. But 2 latter changes are really devastating me... My character change a bit because of it. I used to be a person who love to talk, love to share things and now.... I become a bit quiet, isolated from others and feel awkward to join the group (that my old friend is in) that is gossiping while having lunch... I feel awkward to 'terjah' (which I always do)... I feel awkward to 'sembang, sembang' freely with my officemates.... I really lost my identity... I lost focus in life. I feel uneasy all the time during working time.. The only peace that I felt is at home....

The word 'why, why, why' is always in my mind... Why??? There is an incident happen last 2 weeks which cracks the friendship that we built for years. Just because of the HEARSAY and the BLACK HEARTED person who invigorate (or may be twist) things that I said and a reactive person who cannot accept comments from me and has some issues to face me.

Hmmm, when this gonna end? I really tired of this. I just need a new air to breath, a new environment to work in.... Just let time to decide what's gonna happen... Pray to Allah for the best.